Tips for Managing the Mental Load

It’s the constant to-do list running in the background. The birthday party you haven’t RSVP’d to. The groceries, the dentist appointment, the text you forgot to reply to.
It’s the quiet hum of everything you’re holding, often without anyone even noticing.

This is the mental load. And it’s exhausting.

For many women, especially mothers, it can feel like your mind is never really off. Even in moments of stillness, your mind might be scanning, planning, remembering, or bracing for what’s next. It’s no wonder so many of us feel tired.

So what do we do?

1. We start by noticing it

Naming it. Giving ourselves permission to admit that carrying the weight of “remembering everything” is a kind of labor. One that deserves rest, recognition, and care. Silencing the mind isn’t about shutting it all down. It’s about creating pockets of pause.

2. Create little anchors in your day

One’s remind your nervous system it’s safe to slow down. That not everything needs to be done right now.That might look like a walk without your phone. A deep breathe before getting your kids out of the car.

3. Write things down

We’re talking old school piece of paper and a pen. The power of getting things out of your mind and onto something physical means you’re not holding on to remember. You’re writing them down so you can tend to them in your own time, when you’re ready and feeling motivated to get things done.

The mental load may not disappear overnight. But with awareness, compassion, and gentle rituals of care, it becomes more manageable.